SHOOTING THE MESSENGER or HOW TO READ THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE

I’ve recently been taken to task by the consignor of the Star Trek TOS Phaser that was recently offered up for auction by Profiles In History auction house (read my story HERE). 

And by “taken to task”, I mean he called me “malicious, intellectually dishonest, misleading, unfair, mean-spirited, lacking character, without honor” and “a bully” on the RPF forum. And that was in a single thread.

It’s my own fault. I have a diabolical talent – I can read and write the English language. That’s right – I’ve been called a “hater” because apparently I’m not illiterate. 

Here’s the sentence from the Profiles catalog phaser copy that is the source of the trouble: 

“This fiberglass mid-grade pistol phaser is perhaps the most extensively researched TOS prop that we have ever auctioned, with all of its major features and numerous subtle contours in its design painstakingly screen-matched to several late 2nd and 3rd season The Original Series episodes including “Assignment: Earth”, “Spock’s Brain”, “Plato’s Stepchildren” and “The Cloud Minders”

As the title says – don’t shoot the messenger because, yes, that’s actually one sentence. And therein lies the nature of the problem – because it is so poorly written, you have to tear it apart to figure out its meaning. I came to the conclusion that the copy was claiming multiple screen-matches for the phaser. Especially since this text was accompanied by photos showing the features and episodes in question. But just to be sure, I asked the opinion of several others.

I write for a living, and when I have a language problem, I go to my wife, an English teacher with more than 30 years of experience under her lovely belt. I asked her to read the copy in question and tell me what it meant. She’s not well versed in my hobby so she was a blank slate. Perfect.

She peered at the paragraph-sized sentence and then looked at me in horror. “Don’t shoot the messenger,” I said. She reluctantly read through it, and then read through it again. And again. And again.  “This is awful. It's the very definition of a “comma splice”, she said.  A comma-splice is a sentence that would best be understood if it were two separate sentences. “I’d give it an F”, she added.

She then started to break it down on a piece of paper by using a tool of her trade – the sentence diagram (I kid you not!). Her scratches soon became gobbledlygook to me but after a few minutes she had her answer. Since the consignor likes to use diagrams and such – however confusing – to tell his story, I thought I’d take a page from his book. Here’s a cleaned up version of what she ended up with:

This shows how much my wife really loves me.

I know, right? THIS is a sentence? A poor one, but yes, it’s a sentence.

She explained thusly: “This sentence means ‘This phaser has been extensively researched. It has features and contours that have been screen-matched to four episodes’ ”. 

To further simplify: “It has features screen-matched to four episodes”. 

This is not open to interpretation. If you asked 12 English scholars what the sentence meant, you’d get a unanimous interpretation because a subject is a subject and an object is an object. 

So now we have to decide on what these specific words mean. They are self-evident to me, but apparently not to the consignor so here we go:

“Features and contours” can mean any form, shape, part or detail that makes up the phaser. 

“Screen-matched” means, in prop collector parlance, a specific piece can be matched EXACTLY to a scene through small defects or features that could only be unique to that piece. This is not my own personal definition but is one recognized universally throughout the hobby. Google it for yourself. Screen-matching a prop is extremely difficult, but not impossible. It is a super-charged term and one of the highest proofs of authenticity possible. 

So according to the above breakdown, the text means that this phaser was physically and specifically used in 4 different Star Trek episodes, by virtue of it having been screen-matched by Profiles in all four. 

But that claim is wrong. It can be screen-matched to ONE episode, which is still very cool! It’s enough to confirm screen-use, which is an incredible thing, and good enough, in my opinion, to say the phaser was likely real.

But the consignor feels Profiles does NOT make the “four episode” claim. He says the text "relates to the verification of design characteristics”. And that since later copy contradicts this earlier copy, it can't mean what *I* think it means. Huh?

What I THINK he says it means is that “features on this phaser look like features seen on phasers in various episodes.” See how easy that was? No convoluted wording, no murkiness, and NO CLAIMS OF SCREEN-MATCHING. The term "screen-matching" is nowhere to be found. And if that is indeed what Profiles MEANT, great – then they should have said that. The fact that they didn’t is not my fault. I have no psychic powers that permit me to read intent – I have to stick to the literal meaning of words.

And because of this convoluted B.S., I am scum for soiling the good name of Profiles, and, by extension, him. 

So here’s the question: how do YOU read it? Is my viewpoint so egregiously wrong and (apparently) dangerous as to trigger the extravagant rantings of the consignor? Does my analysis make me malicious, intellectually dishonest, misleading, unfair, mean-spirited, lacking in character, without honor” and a “bully”? (BTW – the name-calling was all one-sided, which makes calling me a bully especially poignant.)

To my mind, the consignor’s reaction is like that of a petty, whining schoolboy who didn’t get his way on the monkey bars. To extend the metaphor, I hope he takes his ball and goes home. But I’m not betting on it.

It’s important to keep in mind that, in the final analysis, I concluded that there was a screen-match to one episode and that the phaser was probably real. Furthermore, I stated that while it COULD be a fake, I didn’t think it was. But that wasn’t good enough for the consignor. By not agreeing with EVERY claim Profiles (and he) made, I was trying to undermine the authenticity of the piece, according to him. And so the rants began. NINE of them in one forum thread!

In a world where everything from Louis Vuitton handbags to Dutch Master oil paintings– AND STAR TREK PROPS – are forged, it would be irresponsible and stupid of me to take a look at some photos and declare it 100% authentic. To fault me for taking that stand is truly absurd, fundamentally shortsighted and just plain dumb. But this illuminates the differences between me and a lot of self-appointed “authorities” out there: I don’t claim to be omniscient, and I despise those that do. And here’s a news flash: saying it MIGHT be a fake is not saying it IS a fake. Asking people to judge for themselves should not be a crime.

This is not the first time this type of thing has happened. I’ve been accused of undermining past auctions because I didn’t swallow the company line whole. But I will always steadfastly assert that with big claims should come big proof. In this case, I actually agreed with the consignor. But I didn’t agree ENOUGH.

With this consignor (as well as some of his cohorts), it is apparently not possible to have a simple disagreement on things. If you disagree – however well grounded your reasons – you’re not only wrong, you’re evil. The mind-set is apparently one of infallibility on their part – any disagreement is heresy and will be dealt with as such. And so I'm malicious, etc.

They also have the ego to think that the only reason I write about what I do is so that I can attack them (because, again, any time I don't agree, it's an attack). How self-absorbed do you have to be to constantly put yourself in the center of the universe? When a Star Trek piece has an asking price of a hundred grand, I don't care who owns it, I'm going to write about it. Read the masthead – it's what I do!

The bottom line is that I don't hate these people. Far from it, as hatred requires caring about them one way or the other. I do pity them, though. Going through life expecting everyone to agree with you on everything and to kiss your ass at all times must be exhausting. I got over that when I was four. Apparently this type never will.

By the way, the consignor also accused me of accusing Profiles (and him) of being dishonest. He says the meaning of the copy is as clear as a bell and no reasonable person could interpret the copy as I have unless they had diabolical intentions. I'll leave it up to you to decide for yourself whose analysis is "intellectually dishonest". IMO, the text is written so poorly that Profiles was either incompetent or deliberately misleading. I can't say which. But I can say that words have meaning. If you want to change the meaning, choose better words.

One last thing – two pieces of advice.

To Profiles: hire a copywriter who writes English as a first language.

To the consignor: don't shoot the messenger. And learn how to read.

LLAP

Don

PREMIERE PROPS NOW OFFERING "AUTHENTIC FAKE" STAR TREK COMMUNICATOR

In yet another new twist on the ongoing problems with Premiere Props' Star Trek offerings, they are now offering the same Communicator prop that had originally been pulled. But now they are offering it as an authentic forgery.

I think my head just exploded.

It comes with a COA so it must be a real forgery rather than a fake forgery. Wait...what??

I have to hand it to Premiere – they're trying their best to make lemonade with the lemons they've been given. According to them there's a collector's market for these fakes, saying:

"Ironically, Mark English "reproductions" have become collectables in their own right."

This is news to me, so I'll be anxiously awaiting the outcome of this auction to see what a "real fake" goes for!

LLAP

Don

PREMIERE PROPS PULLS $100K+ WORTH OF STAR TREK PIECES FROM AUCTION

Every Star Trek item featured on this PP postcard his been pulled.

After being contacted by several parties, Premiere Props has pulled all of the original series Star Trek items from its upcoming auction including:

Phaser 1
Phaser 2
Tricorder
Communicator
Uhura's Pen
Tribble

When these pieces were initially announced a few weeks ago, I was skeptical regarding their authenticity, to say the least (read about it here). Luckily, Premiere was contacted by THE experts on original series props, Herocomm.com, an organization with a mission statement that inclues the following:

"HeroComm is a free and open library of all knowledge that can be gathered on The Original Series Star Trek classic communicator prop. We endeavor through scientific rigor to sort fact from fiction, history from hearsay, and originals from fakes."

While their specialty is TOS Communicators, they also know a lot about the other key TOS props. I can verify from first-hand knowledge that Herocomm lives up to it's mission. When I was working on verifying a TOS Klingon Disruptor, one of their members was a great help. Their process is ruthlessly fact-based and I gratefully endorse it.

Here's what Herocomm told me about their contact with Premiere (reproduced here with their permission). "ME" refers to "Mark English" a known forger of Star Trek props in the 70's and 80's:

"The full credit for pulling from sale what were obvious ME fakes goes to Daniel Levin at Premiere Props. When we initially informed his company of the forgery status of the communicator, he cordially reached out to us and got the information needed to satisfy himself, not just for the comm but the P1, P2 and tricorder. 

In asking for a few key tells, these were the things we pointed out to Dan:

COMMUNICATOR – excessively corroded antenna, mic grill the wrong material, moiré pattern does not match any known undiscovered versions.

P1 – wrong shape (too narrow), the setting window not yellowed, the metal dial too shiny.

P2 – there is no reason for a black/white phaser to ever exist today. All would have been painted grey in Season One.

TRICORDER – no surviving tricorder would have the center compartment "computer disks” and moire as seen in “City on the Edge.” They were removed before Season 2 in Wah’s two and not replicated in the later fiberglass copies. Also rhinestones used instead of watch crowns or painted pin heads.

As it turns out, that batch of TOS props all came from a single owner, and Mr. Levin said they would be returned to that individual.

In fairness, it should be noted we Trek prop geeks take for granted our wealth of arcane knowledge. “Of course that’s a Mark English,” anyone here would say. But imagine being on the outside, where that name means nothing. Items that look good enough come in with a previously assigned CA, just like what happens every day with other prop collections, and, boom, on the sales block it goes. That that didn’t happen this time is a remarkable occurrence. This may very well be the first time ever a major house has cancelled the planned auction of alleged classic Star Trek props due to early fan intervention.

Simply, we were delighted to see action put behind Premiere Prop’s verbal commitment to offer only true genuine items, and we hope this marks a new era of mutual cooperation between auction houses and the many highly-qualified Internet-based experts out there."

While I also applaud PP's willingness to pull the items in question, it still leaves a huge credibility gap for PP going forward. If you're in the prop selling business, you'd have to live under a rock to not know at least the basics of Star Trek prop forgery – ie: that there's a TON of it – and spend at least a small bit of time authenticating such important (and expensive!!) items. It's not like there's a dearth of information out there with HC being at the top of that list. These items would have sold for far more than $100,000 had they been real, and that's something worth doing even the most basic of due diligence for. Beyond the TOS props, calling a yellow TNG uniform a "Data" without a sewn-in tag, or screen matching or solid provenance is also problematic. A real season 1-2 Data uniform could go well in excess of $5000. A no-name background goes for less than $1000.

I can't give Premiere much credit for pulling stuff that they could possibly get sued for later – that's business 101. Had they come to HC BEFORE they put the Trek stuff into their auction, I would applaud them loudly. But IMO, they put those items in there hoping that no one would raise to much fuss about them and they could make some easy cash. And you don't get a slap on the back for that.

I've been told that, because of this experience, Premiere will be instituting new steps to help ensure authenticity of items they sell in the future. Naturally, I think that's a good idea. I also think it's long overdue, though. Shouldn't authenticity be THE key component from day one for ANYONE selling original props and costumes? It should be, but alas, it isn't. Even the biggest, most prestigious of prop sellers, Christie's, recently offered some items that were obvious fakes. Profiles In History, a well-known auction house for movie props has repeatedly offered fakes, in some cases actually featuring them on the cover of their catalogs! On the flip side, Propstore of London does a great job of doing due diligence, so through their example we know it can be done.

Sometimes, debunking or authenticating a prop or costume can be difficult. But many times it can be done in just a few minutes. The Premiere stuff definitely falls into the "easier" category since there's so much information now available on the web.

I hope that Premiere will actually follow through with a new authentication policy. It would be a boon to the hobby and to collectors everywhere.

LLAP

Don

UPDATE 3: TOS Phaser Rifle auction stuns!

The TOS Phaser Rifle I've been fascinated with has sold for a hammer price of $192,500 which means that after the buyer's premium is added ("markup" for the uninitiated) this piece went for $231,000 !  That is a lot of cash and approaches the amount paid for the Enterprise-A model at the Christie's auction in 2006.

Is this a record high number for a Trek prop? It might be, but I need to do some research on that. Either way, it's a princely sum. Keep in mind that the seller doesn't get the whole amount – they have to pay the sellers premium (which is yet ANOTHER word for markup in the auction world!). Julien's doesn't post what that number is, but usually it's similar to the buyer's premium, which in this case is 20% which would make the seller's premium $38,500. The seller would then get $154,000, while Julien's would earn a total of $77,000. I hope the seller negotiated a lower fee!

I have no idea who actually won this piece but it is my hope that it is the Science Fiction Museum in Seattle. That way, all fans would have an opportunity to see this exquisite piece for themselves. If it goes into private hands, I fear it will never be seen again. Until the next time it's auctioned, of course.

ADDENDUM: a friend just e-mailed me a told me that it was collector John Azarian of "The Azarian Collection" fame who bought the piece, not the SciFi Museum. Good for him, bad for the rest of us.

LLAP

Don

UPDATE: Original Series Phaser Rifle Photo Match!!

After poring over as much imagery as I could find regarding the Star Trek Phaser Rifle that Julien's auction house is selling (see my previous story) I've been able to photo match the piece which confirms that it is the one and only, true-blue original Phaser Rifle.

I started by looking at screen-caps of the rifle from the only episode in which it was ever used, "Where No Man Has Gone Before". While it has quite a bit of screen time, it was never large enough or sharp enough in a film frame to see any possible "tells" or unusual details that could be used to match the photos from the auction.

So I moved on to something I've had great success with in the past – PR photos. The rifle was used in at least 2 rounds of PR photos, first when the pilot was shot, and later when the show was actually being launched. Low and behold, I was able to find a great shot that shows conclusively that scratches seen on the sale piece are also evident on the piece in the PR shot. The great thing about scratches is that they are irregular and organic and virtually impossible to fake. Judge for yourself in this photo which zeroes in on the front of the rifle's body:

I've numbered 3 areas that show an absolute match. The color difference is simply the lighting. I've found some other marks that match up, but nothing as clear and specific as this.

While this might seem like flimsy evidence, in prop collecting this is as good as a fingerprint. It's not IMPOSSIBLE to fake, but it's really, really, really hard. And when combined with the total accuracy of all the structural details, I think this makes it a 100% certainty that this is an original – THE original – Phaser Rifle.

So if you've got the better part of a hundred grand, bid with confidence!

LLAP

Don

The Ultimate Star Trek Prop Found: The TOS Phaser Rifle

In Star Trek lore there are plenty of iconic pieces to collect – phasers and tribbles, communicators and uniforms, as well as the various incarnations of the Enterprise itself. All of the original versions of these items – original props, costumes or models – are all highly collectible. And while there are some one-of-a-kind pieces out there, like the original Enterprise shooting model, most pieces were made in some kind of quantity, however low. True phaser pistol props are rare, but there's more than one. Same with comms and, of course, tribbles. Lots and lots of Tribbles.

But one piece was made for the original pilot episode "Where No Man Has Gone Before" (actually the second pilot, but that's another matter) and was never seen thereafter – the infamous Phaser Rifle. Infamous in that it was a cool prop used by Captain Kirk himself in one of the best stories in Trek history, but its whereabouts have been unknown ever since it was last seen on the set of Star Trek in 1966. The famous Christie's Star Trek auction of 2006 sold off more iconic screen-used Trek material than at any other time in the history of the franchise, but the best they could do for a Phaser Rifle was a nice replica.

With that in mind, imagine how floored I was when I read  that Julien's auction house would be auctioning off the one and only ORIGINAL Phaser Rifle! The auction listing states that the rifle was made by toy designer Reuben Klamer for Gene Roddenberry at no charge, "in exchange for potential licensing rights". The prop rifle was featured heavily in the Shatner Star Trek pilot "Where No Man Has Gone Before" and was widely used in various PR shots for the new series. Then, the prop was evidently returned to Klamer, never to be seen again.

Until now! The auction shows several pieces of paperwork with correspondence between Roddenberry and Klamer, as well as some great photos showing the piece "behind the scenes". There's even an original sketch. This all makes for a very compelling story in support of its authenticity. The piece looks to be in beautiful condition and was apparently stored all these years in a custom-made case that was originally used to transport it to the set and keep it safe.

I want to note that for years, actress Sally Kellerman, who appeared in the pilot with Shatner, claimed to have the rifle prop and that it was given to her by the prop man on the set. That now seems even more unlikely than it did when I first read about it. I'm not getting the sense that she's the consignor, but we'll see.

I can't think of a more important Star Trek piece to resurface since Chistie's auctions. While the Galileo shuttlecraft find was cool, the piece was in such awful condition that it can now scarcely be considered to be original. But this looks to be in similar condition as when it was last in Shatner's hands those many years ago. It shows some definite wear and tear but it's all there. And it's a hand prop, which means you don't have to have a garage in which to house it. And it's a Phaser Rifle! THE Phaser Rifle! Infinitely cool!!!

 The estimate of $50,000 to $70,000 might seem high, but not for such an important piece, in my opinion. I would not be surprised to see it go for more. MUCH more! If there's such a thing as a priceless Star Trek piece, this is it.

This announcement has to get the juices of flowing of any fan or collector of The Original Series. It's one of a kind, it's in original condition and it will have a new owner soon! Great stuff!

The auction catalog can be viewed at Juliens.

LLAP

Don